If you find meditation a bit of a struggle then firstly, please know this is normal.

Meditation is something that hasn’t always come easily to me and is still an evolution. I want you to recognise that practising mindfulness is all about the journey rather the destination.

I used to feel frustrated by the fact that I was unable to “empty my mind” as some experts suggest. That is, until I realised that the objective was opposite. Minds wander – it’s what they are meant to do. So when we meditate, it’s about allowing the thoughts in rather than pushing them away.

Over time, you will notice that when you stop resisting your thoughts, meditation is easier. You will see how your thoughts come and go and become an observer rather than a participant. How cool is that?

I also used to make excuses about not having “time” to meditate. I’m lovingly calling you out on this because it’s nothing more than a story. Life is busy and making time to meditate can be a challenge. The reality is that meditating creates more time and space in your life, as well as an opportunity to slow things down.

Meditation doesn’t need to involve forcing yourself to sit still on a cushion for an hour every day. It’s true that consistency is the key to developing a sense of inner calm, and it’s better to develop a mindful habit for a few minutes each day, rather than random meditations.

I get that when you’re grieving or working through some challenges in your life, it can be more difficult to relax into meditation. But learning how to grieve mindfully will really help you in your healing.

Here’s 5 ways you can make it super easy on yourself:

1. Set a timer for 2 minutes and just spend time breathing / being with yourself. Slowly increase the timer when you’re ready.

2. Be comfortable. If sitting cross legged gives you cramp, then don’t. You can meditate lying on the floor with your legs on a chair, up right in a chair.

3. When you have a busy day, set a small goal to breath 10 times. As long as your breathing, you may as well meditate. We can all do this, right?

4. Use help when you need it. A relaxing CD or a guided meditation helps. You can find stacks online that are just a few minutes long.

5. Remember your “why”. Each time you meditate and enjoy the experience, make a mental note of what you loved and how it made you feel. When you feel the laziness creeping in, remind yourself of these.

No need to force it.

This is about finding what works for you. There are no “shoulds, woulds and coulds”. You don’t need to rise at 5am daily if morning routine isn’t your thing. There are many pathways to inner peace – find yours.

For further tips on mindfulness and meditation on your grief journey, sign up to receive my THRIVE newsletter.

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